The Three Little Pigs

I hate to refer to them as the Three Little Pigs, but they've certainly earned the title. I thought I'd give an update on all the children as I still have NO LIFE of my own.

Braveheart is killing me. Along with her new McDonald's career, she is convinced that she is going to be a rockstar. She spent the night with my sister and her hubby. I think they created a monster. You see, they also thought they would be part of the rockstar scene and they actually got pretty close. They interviewed with the manager for Nine Inch Nails and had the same agent as Jewel for a while. But, like most VH1 Where Are They Now? episodes, the band had a falling out and split up. Oh, what could have been is now turning into fuel for the fire in Braveheart's rockstar dream. She was sent home with Billboard magazines, Rolling Stone and a few books on the business side of music. Seriously, she probably will be famous someday because when this kid puts her mind to something there is no stopping her. It's extremely aggravating.

Prince Lawn Gnome and I are spending time on very, very thin ice lately. He is 15 and thinks he's 20. He also thinks that I am a complete idiot and that I am trying to control his life. I feel the need to remind him that if it weren't for me he wouldn't even have a life and if his tone doesn't change then I will certainly do the honor of extinquishing it for him. Oh, how I long for a son that speaks to me as if I am an actual person and not just an ATM. Intellectually, I know this is a phase that we must get through, but honestly, it is wearing me down. When will he be motivated to do something besides eat, play Halo and eat some more? I keep waiting for him to turn the corner and come out with some maturity under his belt, yep, I keep waiting and waiting... And, just what is with him only wearing shorts in the winter? Is there some body temperature thing I don't know about that goes along with puberty? Somebody clue me in here, please.

Songbird had volleyball tryouts today and was encouraged as she "almost made the competitive team." I find that hard to believe as she is as uncoordinated as they come, but maybe she is coming into her own. Now, she is completely obsessed with which team she'll be on because of who else might be on that team. She's all about the social aspect. And, once she knows which team, she'll be all about the glamorizing up of the uniform. I overheard talk of a Bedazzler.

She also tried out for choir. I hate to sound like one of THOSE mothers, but she'll be a shoe in. The kid was born to sing. But part of being in choir means that she will be in 7th grade next year. 7th grade? 7th grade is still part of me, I remember it vividly, 7th grade helped warp (I mean shape) me into who I am today. How is my baby old enough to be going into 7th grade? It's unreal. You know what comes along with 7th grade? Make-up, boys, the shaving of legs, usually a first heart break and so much else that I'm sick just thinking of it. Oh, Lord help me!