It's Our Job to Trust

This week is a case study in trust, as I am sure, the coming weeks or months will be too. My darling hubby was let go from his job yesterday. I know that there are many, many of you that understand. We are not special. And, yet, we are not somber or whirling in chaos, really it's just a feeling of agitation. The kind of agitation that resides in the muscles of your shoulders and feels achy.

I know, intellectually, that it is God's job to provide and our job to trust that He will. Intellectually. Living out that trust is going to be a great test. It's as if God is saying to me, "You say that you believe, but do you really?"

You see, my hubby and I believe that it is God's desire that he goes into full time ministry. And, while some positions come with a nice salary, our particular church very much lives on God's good graces. It's not clear where a salary would come from right now. Again, for those of you who don't personally know me, I must reiterate that I am a control freak, a planner. Trust in financial matters is hard for me and yet, I feel relatively peaceful about it. Physically, though, like I said, there is a strange agitation. It even crept into my dreams. I dreamt of the cheesecake I had just made. I dreamt that Songbird had cut a huge chunk out of the cake. I was weeping in the dream, sobbing really, and I awoke so tensed up. I don't remember ever dreaming a dream like that before.

So, if you feel so inclined, I would appreciate any prayers. Prayer for the trust factor, prayer that my hubby will finally step into the position that he is supposed to be in. Pray that I can be responsible with the money that does come in. Thanks.